Indsæt klichéfyldt citat om, hvor hurtigt ting ændrer sig

Fredag eftermiddag, da klokken slog 17, var tiden oprandt, og min sidste antropologi forelæsning i mit 1. år var kommet til en ende. Nok min sidste antropologi forelæsning nogensinde.

Den tre uger lange påskeferie stod for døren. Dem der kender mig vil nok tænke, at jeg, selvom jeg glædede mig til den forestående ferie, så ville jeg savne skolen. Der er jo trods alt mange måneder til, at den står på almindelig hverdag igen.

Tjah.. Nej. Jeg var ikke engang til den sidste forelæsning.

Lad os lige slå det fast:

Jeg elskede 1. semester. Jeg nød at komme i skole hver eneste dag. Der var ikke det fag, jeg ikke nød at komme til. Og jeg arbejdede hårdt. Læste hver eneste dag. Havde min faste hverdag med svøming 5 gange om ugen. Mine eksamener gik rigtig godt. Balance.

2. semester har været mere ubalanceret.

Mere meget ubalanceret.

Jeg tror at jeg for første gang nogensinde oplever det, man kalder ’skoletræthed’.

Og det er mærkeligt.

For jeg har haft nok verdens bedste filosofi tutorial med verdens mest engagerede lærer og faget har været ekstremt spændende generelt. Mit essay var markant bedre end det, jeg skrev i filosofi sidste semester, og fik A5 (18 ud af 22) denne her gang hvor jeg fik C3 (12 ud af 22) sidste semester. Fra et 'pass' til et 'excellent'. Det er altså en forskel, der vil noget - jeg klapper lige mig selv på skulderen!

Men her stopper mit normale overly positive jeg også. Dette semesters Politics-fag været meget middelmådigt, hvorimod jeg nød det rigtig meget sidste semester. Heldigvis er skylden lige fordelt på visse meget demotiverende forelæsere og kedeligt indhold. Min tutorial har været vildt hyggelig, og vi har haft nogle spændende debatter – men jeg har aldrig fattet mindre end politik, så det britiske valg skal følges på tætteste hold når vi kommer dertil i maj!

Spansk har været dødkedeligt udelukkende grundet det, at jeg har lært det hele mindst 2 gange før. På den positive side har vi letheden ved at få gode karakterer og det faktum at jeg har haft det sammen med en af mine gode venner (som ovenikøbet deler min kærlighed for Argentina) som jeg ikke fik set særlig meget sidste år grundet forskellige skemaer. Og nå ja, den bedste ting ved spansk var vores oral-classes, hvor vores professor er fra Argentina. Den ene time om ugen nød jeg. Det savner jeg allerede. Vi blev ikke tvunget til vænne os af med at snakke med den argentinske accent; det var nok det bedste af det hele. Endelig en der forstår!

Antropologi, som jeg knuselskede sidste semester, har været tørrere end en ørken og det gjorde det ikke bedre af, at vi har haft nogle herlige, men ret kedelige lektorer. Der har dog været nogle spændende ting imellem: jeg skrev mit essay om race, og nød virkelig forelæsningerne om race og etnicitet. Desværre var jeg jo tvunget til at gå glip af 50% af forelæsningerne (på grund af spansk - så bliver det heller ikke værre), og motivationen til at lytte til dem og gå igennem PowerPointen... den var ikke altid på sit højeste, det vil jeg godt indrømme. Dog har jeg allerede formået at gå fra C til B overall med min antropologi-karakter. Jeg ved ikke hvordan det er gået til. 

Men ja, man kan jo ikke altid få det hele, vel?

Så i stedet for at slå mig i hovedet over at min motivation ikke har været på sit absolut højeste, vil jeg slå mig tilbage og tænke på de ekstremt gode ting, der er sket for mig i mit 2. semester. To af mine venner og næsten hele min familie (nu venter jeg kun på dig Nud!) har taget hele vejen fra Danmark til Skotland for at besøge mig i løbet af januar, februar og marts. Jeg har været i Edinburgh tre gange og jeg fik endelig set Stonehaven og Dunnottar Castle. Jeg lagde sidste hånd på min udvekslingsansøgning i januar og fik i februar at vide, at jeg var tilbudt en plads i Tennessee fra september af. Pænt ja tak blev det efter mange overvejelser. Er endelig opstartet med Royal Voluntary Service hvor jeg i torsdags var til en Dementia Awareness-session. Man lærer noget nyt hver eneste dag.

Og nå ja, så er jeg faldet noget så grusomt for en engelsk fyr, som fik mig til at komme ned fra min høje hest og min egen stædige overbevisning om, at jeg altså har everything figured out. Det har jeg ikke, skal jeg så lige tilføje. Måske har forelskelsen også noget at sige i alt det her. Det er ikke til at sige.

Og hvad så nu? Semesteret er desværre ikke helt slut endnu, eksamenerne venter stadig, for mit vedkommende startende d. 6. maj. Men der er lidt tid endnu. For ligenu sidder jeg nemlig i London Gatwick og lige om lidt letter mit fly til Ukraine, hvor der ligger et fly og venter på at flyve mig til Thailand, hvor jeg starter min påskeferie i Nakhon Ratchasima. Så for nu ligger jeg Skotland, universitetet, eksamensrevision og alt det andet på hylden. Hører lidt Calle 13, drømmer mig tilbage til Argentina. Jeg skal nok komme tilbage en dag. Men nu er det tid til at skabe nye minder, se nye steder; så jeg begiver mig ud i noget af det, jeg med sikkerhed ved hvordan man gør og som jeg efterhånden er ekspert i. 
At rejse.

Friday afternoon around 5 o'clock, I should've been seated in FN1 in Fraser Noble, just finishing my last anthropology lecture of 2nd semester. Probably my last anthropology lecture ever. However, I wasn't. I wasn't at philosophy either. People who know me well will know that this is odd, and that this is not something I'd usually do. People who know me would say that yeah, I was looking forward to the three week long vacation, but that missing uni and the daily grind would inevitably happen. It's not gonna happen. I should've been at that lecture. But I wasn't.

Let me make it clear:
I loved my 1st semester at Aberdeen. I enjoyed every day. No lie. I enjoyed my subjects immensely. I was a hard working student. As I’ve been all my life. I’ve never been the best, but I’ve worked to be up there. I studied every single day. Went to every single lecture, every single tutorial. Studied every day after school even though I had swimming until 10.30pm later on. My daily grind was pretty set, and I loved it. It’s been this way my entire life. I’ve loved it, but the time comes where it tires you and you get sick of it. Last semester was balanced.

This semester has been a bit more unbalanced.

A lot more unbalanced. I think I’m experiencing the not so super rare phenomenon that is being tired of school. All I know is that I’m glad this semester is over.

It’s weird.

It’s very weird indeed due to the fact that I’ve had the best philosophy tutorial one could ever have with the best teacher one could ever have the pleasure of having. I’ve loved the subject in general too. My essay was a A5 instead of the C3 I managed to pull through with last semester. From passing to doing excellent. I’m not afraid to say that I’m proud of myself. I am. I don’t understand how it happened, but somehow it did.

And this is where my usually overly positive outlook on life stops when reflecting on my classes. Whereas I loved IR last semester, Politics has been a drag this semester. Whilst not being exactly sure of what the reason for this is, all I know is that the lectures have been exceptionally demotivating. My tutorial was very pleasant. My essay was worse than last semester despite putting so much more effort into this one. I don’t get it. Oh well. We’ve established that I know nothing about politics. Thank god the British elections are coming up. I need to learn.

Moving on to Spanish, I’ve not much better to say. I’ve been bored simply because of the reason that I’ve learnt all the material twice before. We were denied entry to the appropriate level of Spanish so the only good thing about this class has been the fact that getting good grades did not require any effort and the fact that my oral teacher was Argentinian. This meant talking about dulce de leche, mate, Buenos Aires and the rioplatense. It was lovely. I’m gonna miss that, that I’ll admit.

Anthropology, a subject that I loved to bits last semester, has been dreadful this semester. Some of the topics have been interesting, we’ve had lectures on race and ethnicity which I also wrote my essay on. Unfortunately, due to every Spanish class being mandatory, I had to miss 50% of the anthropology lectures. Which did clearly not motivate either. I have a lot of revision to do, that’s for sure. And how I’ve managed to already go from a C to a B in my overall grade in anthropology will remain a mystery. But hey, I’m not complaining!

You can’t always have it all.

So instead of freaking out and desperately trying to figure out where it all went wrong this term, I’m just gonna lay back and relax. Reflect on some of the good things that’s happened this term, ‘cuz the good things tend to outshine the negative. That’s also the case here.

Two very good friends and almost all of my family have made it to Scotland during January, February and March. I’ve been to Edinburgh three times and I’ve finally managed to see Stonehaven and Dunnottar Castle. I finished my exchange-application in January and was offered a place in Tennessee a few weeks later. I ended up taking it. Of course I did. But the decision was hard. And last but certainly not least, I’ve started with Royal Voluntary Service. A few days ago, I was at a Dementia Awareness-session and now I’m a little bit smarter. You learn something new every day, right?

And oh yeah, I’ve fallen for this guy. Most people already know this. But he deserves a mention here as well. I’ve fallen in love with the most wonderful English guy who managed to get me down to earth and made me realize, with even intending it, that I don’t have everything figured out. I really don’t. I’ve stepped down from my high horse. Now I’m down with the puppies on the floor.

So, what now? The semester’s not exactly over yet. I have my first exam on May 6^th. There’s still time. As of right now, I’m located in the departures-lounge in London Gatwick and in a minute I’m off to Kiev International Airport. It's just a layover though, I'll fly to Thailand tonight at 8pm where I’ll kick off my spring break in Nakhon Ratchasima with one of my Singaporean friends whom I met in Tokyo back in the days. For now, I’ll forget about everything related to university, revision and exams. I’ll listen to some Calle 13, make a mental trip back to Argentina. I’ll be back one day. But for now, I’ll remember the good times and not let them prevent me from making new memories and see new places. New cities and new beaches. So now I’m off to something I for sure know how to do and something I’m actually pretty good at.
Travelling.